Fabulous Financials

photo credit: eyemage

What does FREEDOM mean to you?

Let’s think about a few things…

Where do you want to live?

What do you want to study?

What is your dream career?

How much money do you want to earn?

What kind of house do you want to call home?

What kind of lifestyle do you want to lead?

Where do you want to vacation?

What charitable organizations do you want to support?

In my opinion, freedom means having options to choose what I WANT to do, instead of being forced to do something because I HAVE to.

For example…

I wanted to earn an MBA without incurring student loans, so I found a job that would pay for it.

I wanted to increase my salary, so I earned several promotions.

I wanted to buy a house, so I bought one.

I didn’t like my daughter’s school, so I moved.

I wanted to be in the best school district in my preferred DC suburb, so I found the school, then decided where I wanted to live. Price wasn’t a factor.

I wanted to live in a gated community with 2br and 2ba roommate layout, so I found one.

I didn’t want to pay relocation expenses, so I found a job that would foot the bill.

I was leaving a job I loved, so I earned a promotion to make it worth my while.

Eventually, I realized I didn’t like the new job, so I quit.

Some of you might think I’m bold, others may even think I’m crazy. But when you are debt free, live beneath your means, set aside more than 20% of your income for the future, and have extra left over to spend however you choose, I consider it FREEDOM.

A few weeks ago, a fabulous reader sent me the following message via email and I just wanted to share. It helped me tremendously when I was going through and I have no doubt that this message will help at least one of you. Whether you’re having money problems, marital problems, family problems, work related problems, etc. - facing adversity is life skill that is learned and mastered by successful people.

From the Joel Osteen Ministries “Live Like a Champion Devotionals”…

Anytime God is about to take you to a new level you’re going to face opposition. There will be new battles to fight and new obstacles to overcome. It’s easy to get discouraged and think, “Why is this happening?” But we have to change our thinking and focus on the fact that on the other side of those challenges is a new level of victory—a new level of success.

David would only be known as a shepherd boy if it weren’t for Goliath. David’s enemy became the tool that God used to promote him. And God will do the same in your life today. He’ll use those challenges and difficulties in your life to catapult you towards success!

If you are going through a hard time today, if things look impossible, don’t give up now. Change your perspective and believe that God is working behind the scenes. Put a smile on your face and stand in confidence knowing that you are a child of the Most High God. When all is said and done, you’re not just going to come out of that difficulty, but you’re coming out stronger, wiser, and better than you were before! That problem is going to be the catalyst for God to open supernatural doors of opportunity for you! Stand strong in the Lord today and trust that what the enemy meant for your harm, God will turn around and use to your advantage. He’ll take you places you never dreamed and cause you to rise higher and higher in every area of your life!

Emphasis in bold is mine. As many of you may know, my life hasn’t been a cake walk. But if I tried to tell someone how true those bold statements are by giving personal examples, they probably wouldn’t believe me. By writing this blog, you read my testimony as it occurs. I am a work in progress so I hope you realize the Single Ma of today is not the same Single Ma of yesterday. And with each passing day, I get more fabulous than the last. Now can you imagine what I intend to achieve in the next year? Next 5? 10? 20?

Lawdymercy, y’all aint ready! LOL

Watch/listen to the full “Adversity” video [here].

…or is it?

This post is off topic and pretty lengthy, so feel free to read, comment, ignore, or delete. But I need to focus on something positive for a moment. Bear with me.

Also, this post was in draft for a while, so “today” actually means “Tuesday,” April 22nd.

The Old J.O.B.

Today was my last day in the office and the staff hosted a farewell brunch. According to the invite, it was originally schedule for 9:30-12:30, which I thought was a bit long to bid someone farewell. Besides, I don’t like people and I wasn’t in the mood to be the center of attention (you know I must be under the weather), so it was shortened to 10:00-12:00 at my request. Still a long time, but I didn’t want to press the issue too much. Ok, cool.

For some reason, I had a little extra pep in my step this morning - maybe because I was listening to Beyonce “Get Me Bodied” all the way to work. That’s my song! I need to give thanks to Bey for giving me extra motivation to focus on the busy day ahead.

First things first. Despite multiple interviews, my boss still has not found my replacement. So that means she will assume most of my management duties and the administrative work was divided amongst three people. Yes, you read that right. It will take FOUR people (including boss) to complete the tasks of ONE person. That should give you an idea of the load I carried. Hmph! But guess what? All of a sudden, almost everything that had been lagging over the past month or two miraculously began to progress. People were asking me to review reports, attend meetings to make quick decisions, send emails to confirm something I’d said, sign documents, approve vacation, etc. Lesson learned: quit your job and things get done. I think I was more productive today than I’ve been in the past 12 months. LOL

Mr. Eye Candy Read more »

I thought I had overcome this bad habit, but I haven’t. The old behavior was simply lying dormant until a significant event triggered its onset. I won’t get into the details of my personal life, but I’ll say this much - whoever said “bad things happen in 3″ is a gotdayum lie! I’ve dealt with so many blows over the past week, I’ve lost count. And you all know I’m usually responsible, especially with my money, so reckless spending should be an indication of what I’m going through.

As of today, I’ve already exceeded the limit on every nonessential category in my monthly spend plan…and counting:

• Personal Pampering: $118 over
• Dining Out: $255 over
• Shopping: $280 over

On top of that - despite the cost of gas, $45-$50 to fill up, I can’t sit still. I’m either going someplace to keep my mind occupied or prancing around the house and trying to be all Martha Stewart-ish. My house is spotless, my closets are organized, my kitchen floor is sparkling, and every piece of laundry is clean, folded, and put in its rightful place. I even gave the dog a bath! Although I just spent $52 to have her groomed less than 2 weeks ago.

*sigh*

Needless to say, I’m dealing with multiple things from almost every angle. And unfortunately, things may get worse before they get better. I know this and I accept it as a way of life. But on the dimly lit bright side, my skin is thick, my faith is strong, and I’ve always been a fighter. So when the dust settles, I’ll be more fabulous than ever. Believe it!

Until then, spending money on my house and myself makes me feel better. Even if only temporary. I won’t attempt to justify my irresponsible behavior because I don’t want to insult your intelligence. However, I would like to use my personal hardships as an opportunity to demonstrate how being debt free and making responsible financial decisions (when times are good) can help you weather the storm (when times are bad).

Similar to my thoughts about unexpected expenses, I will also survive the effects of stress and emotional spending. Maybe not completely unscathed, but I’ll take minor scrapes and bruises over a financial disaster any day. So make sure YOU are prepared for life’s curve balls: get rid of your debt, avoid new debt, establish an emergency fund, live beneath your means, and make wise financial decisions TODAY. And trust me when I tell ya - bad things don’t stop at 3.

I’ve been forcing myself to blog this week, but I’m really not into it. Single Ma doesn’t fake the funk very well, so instead of trying to delay the inevitable, I’m going to take a break and deal with a few things in my personal life:

1 - Job #1 has completed my background investigation and they’re prepared to extend a ‘firm’ offer. HOWEVER, they want me to sign a 3 year tenure agreement. *raised eyebrow* The position is defined as “critical” so they need a minimum commitment. This is a problem for me. It’s not that I intend to job hop, but I don’t like anyone to control my destiny. Second, I don’t like shackles that limit my career options. Third, this is a lateral move for the same pay, which makes an offer with a restrictive agreement even less attractive.

2 - My current employer is laying it on thick. My boss, in her typical passive aggressive way, has apologized in a zillion ways without actually apologizing. She has admitted her faults and is telling everyone BUT ME how sorry she is and that she doesn’t know what she will do without me. If I didn’t know any better, I’d think she paid everyone in the office to beg me to stay. I’m catching flack left and right. While it’s flattering, it also makes me very uncomfortable.

3 - Mr. Eye Candy and I are not seeing eye to eye on something that is very important to me. It’s not a deal breaker, but it’s not something I’m prepared to compromise on either. *sigh* Why does being a grown up have to be so hard. I miss the days of “I like you, do you like me? Then, will you be my girlfriend? Yes. Ok, we go together.” LOL!

4 - I’m trying very hard to be a nice person, but some people just bring the bitch out in me. I’m already this close >< to going there. I feel sorry for the lucky person who will be on the receiving end of my wrath. It’s been a long time and I have one specific person on my radar.

5 - I received BabyGirl’s report card in the mail yesterday. She earned 4 As, 2 Bs, and a D. Lawdymercy, somebody pray for this child before I jack her up. Same teacher, same class as before. Conference with the teacher, vice principal and guidance counselor in the morning.

6 - My tenant is moving out on June 30th, so I need to clean, paint, advertise and go through the motions of finding good tenants again. In addition, I have about $800 of irregular expenses coming up: auto ins. premium, rental ins. premium, lease renewal amenity fee, auto inspection and registration. Sheesh! This is going to be an expensive summer!

Despite all of this going on at the same time, I’m in a very peaceful state of mind. It’s weird and hard to explain, but it’s as if someone has whispered in my ear and said “don’t worry, let me take care of it.” I’m very confident that everything will work out. I just need to take a break for now.

I’ll be back on Monday. Have a great weekend!