Fabulous Financials

Slowly but surely, I am starting to feel like my old self again.  I hung out with some friends on Saturday.  First, my girl Debt Hater took me to her trampoline class.  Whew lawd!  Who knew there was a specific technique and form to jumping on a durn trampoline?  Sheesh! By the time I was done, I felt like I had been running AND working out with Jillian on The 30 Day Shred.  I was sore from my neck to the tip of my toes (literally) and had bruises on my knees and hands.  Yes, it is that physically strenuous. LOL  My wallet got a workout too because the cost of one class was $40.  Umm…yea. But it was fun and I’d definitely do it again.

After class, Debt Hater and I met up with Tisha for brunch at Crème Café in DC.  I think I had THE best chicken and waffles I’ve ever tasted in my life.  I should have known I was in the right place when the waiter didn’t flinch after I asked him to substitute the fried chicken for oven roasted.  You’re probably wondering, oven roasted chicken with waffles?  Yeeeeeees!!  Me no likey fried anything anymore.  The chicken breast they brought out was flavored to perfection and it was sooo moist and juicy.  Mmm…mouth watering!  The waffle was topped with fruit and was as big as the whole plate.  Can you say yummy to my tummy?!  Everything was so good, I had to send my appreciation to the cook.  We each ordered drinks and my rum punch was pretty good too.  To top it off, the service was excellent and I had a great afternoon with friends.  Just what the doctor ordered.         

On Sunday, I spent some time with the Lord.  It began with me doing a lot of talking, then a lot of listening, and ended with a whole lot of crying.  It was a much needed emotional cleanse.  After church, I spent a little time making my empty nest feel like a home.  I put up some curtains, unpacked a box (yes I’m still unpacking lazy), hung a mirror and a few wall accents, and organized a growing stack of papers.  And then…I had a date that lasted 4 hours. :-)

When I woke up this morning, I felt refreshed and happy.  I spent the first 15 minutes stretching on the floor.  That trampoline class did a number on my old bones.  Then I prayed, showered, and took my time eating breakfast.  When I finally decided to to get dressed, I eyeballed a pair of heels that I hadn’t worn in a long time – tiger print, peep toe, sling backs.  I slipped them on my feet and instantly felt brand new.  Funky shoes always make me smile.  Oh, and it helps that this size 10 skirt feels loose too. LOL

As soon as I settled into my office, I received a text from CG…

“Good Morning Mommy. I Love You.” 

I guess what they say is true.  Slowly but surely, everything is going to be alright.

I woke up feeling strange this morning.  The silence piercing the air reminded me of the drastic change that has just taken place in my life.  After 18 years of being a mom, I am now an empty-nester.  As of yesterday, I took my only child to college for the very first time.

Accepting new my reality, I knew when I rose out of bed, I had to make a choice. A good choice. A healthy choice. A choice that would help me sort through my thoughts and emotions. A choice that would lay the foundation for the rest of my life.  Within minutes of opening my eyes, I decided to get dressed and go for a run.

By 7:30, it was already 70 degrees outside and getting hotter each minute.  I chose to run the same path in my neighborhood that I’ve run before. The one with the hills and random uneven pavement. Similar to last week, I ran each hill with determination.  But I refused to quit and walk this time.  I refused to be defeated.  The longest hill was the most challenging and it reminded me of some of the most difficult challenges I’ve overcome while raising my daughter.  As I reminisced about the past 18 years of mommy-hood, my mental stamina kicked in and I decided to push myself beyond anything I’ve ever physically done before.

I pushed through each of those hills and did NOT take a walk break when I reached the top.  I felt healthy and strong, so why quit if I didn’t “need” to.  I glanced at my Polar to check my hear rate, which read 186 and exceeded 80% of my maximum.  So I slowed down a bit, but continued to run and run until I reached the landmark that I had identified as my official stopping point.

However, when I reached that landmark, I decided to keep running.  With each step, I replayed the previous day’s events in my head.

• When she walked out of her (now empty) bedroom for the very last time.
• When we finished loading the car, got in, locked the doors, I asked “are you ready?” and she responded “yep!” with a slight hint of fear in her eyes.
• When we arrived at her dorm room door and saw a welcome poster from the band with her name and music symbols beneath it.
• When she used her key to unlock her dorm room door for the first time.
• When we unloaded the car and set everything up exactly the way she wanted it.
• When we walked around the campus and she kept grabbing my right arm to pull me close.
• The look in her eyes when I gave her the the mini photo album of hand selected pictures from age 2 through senior year.
• The tears in her eyes when I presented my hand written letter, but asked her not to read it until after I was gone or when she needed something to make her feel close to home.
• The smile on her face when I gave my final “mommy lecture” on smart decisions and life choices.
• And the final moment before I left when I wrote “I love you XX ~Mommy~” on the dry erase board outside of her dorm room door.

The memory of each moment made me smile and cry.  I used my shirt to wipe my sweat and tears, but I kept running.

When I circled back and reached the entrance of my community, I decided to cool down and head back to my apartment.  As I walked the rest of the way home, I realized, yesterday was absolutely perfect and everything that I had imagined.  After 9 months and 18 years, my daughter is now a college student. And after 8 months of practice, I now consider myself a real runner.

…and we’re off!

The year 2010, especially June and July, has been exciting. I changed my life for the better, lost -45 lbs, and ran my first 5k.  BG had an amazing senior year full of fun and memories, attended her senior prom, and graduated high school.  We vacationed in Europe, attended college orientation, and moved into a new apartment.  With all of that behind us, I can finally catch my breath and relax. *woosah*

The last exciting thing that we’ve all been waiting for is finally approaching.  Tomorrow, I will send my BabyGirl off into the world and give her the freedom to spread her wings.  From this day forward, she will be officially known as CollegeGirl.

Honey, if you’re reading this, the world is at your fingertips.  Explore life, make smart decisions, learn new things, challenge yourself, take risks, and most importantly, have fun!

Today, you will become of age in France.  Of all places, the beautiful Paris.  We will celebrate this milestone birthday with lunch at the Eiffel Tower, leisure strolls through quaint neighborhoods and shops, and whatever else your little heart desires.  I hope you enjoy this day and remember it for the rest of your life.

And by the way…although you’re an adult now, you will ALWAYS be my baby. :-)

Mommy loves you!