Comments on: Victims of the Economy or Frivolous Spenders? http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html The journey of a fabulous single mom pursuing financial independence Fri, 09 Jan 2009 13:36:18 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6 By: MM http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html#comment-28013 MM Mon, 15 Sep 2008 14:25:50 +0000 http://fabulousfinancials.com/?p=1305#comment-28013 SingleMa - no, we haven't hosted an umemployment party, and I'm not sure how to take the concept - and as you suggest, I'd hesitate to judge because I'm not in their shoes. However, just last night, we hosted an EMPLOYMENT party! Dh got an honest-to-goodness, salaried 9 to 5 job - almost out of the blue. Huzzah! Love your blog, keep telling us! SingleMa - no, we haven’t hosted an umemployment party, and I’m not sure how to take the concept - and as you suggest, I’d hesitate to judge because I’m not in their shoes. However, just last night, we hosted an EMPLOYMENT party! Dh got an honest-to-goodness, salaried 9 to 5 job - almost out of the blue. Huzzah! Love your blog, keep telling us!

]]> By: Moneymonk http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html#comment-27413 Moneymonk Mon, 08 Sep 2008 15:30:56 +0000 http://fabulousfinancials.com/?p=1305#comment-27413 It's more pychological, I understand when you lived a "good" life it's just hard to downgrade, that's why people tend to touch the credit cards more when income stops- just to keep the lifestyle. Why? no one wants to feel poor Everyone needs to go to a third world country at least one time in their lives to realize how rich we all are. "Dude needs to man up and get his hands dirty!" I do agree I find a trend here, men are becoming more wimpy and women are stepping up more to provide for the family. ---------------------------- LOL@ Rufina well explained single Ma It’s more pychological,

I understand when you lived a “good” life it’s just hard to downgrade, that’s why people tend to touch the credit cards more when income stops- just to keep the lifestyle. Why? no one wants to feel poor

Everyone needs to go to a third world country at least one time in their lives to realize how rich we all are.

“Dude needs to man up and get his hands dirty!” I do agree

I find a trend here, men are becoming more wimpy and women are stepping up more to provide for the family.

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LOL@ Rufina

well explained single Ma

]]> By: JT http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html#comment-27411 JT Mon, 08 Sep 2008 14:50:32 +0000 http://fabulousfinancials.com/?p=1305#comment-27411 Interesting reader question and thought-provoking, as always, post! I certainly echo the "judge not" message and the idea that one's choices, circumstances, and perceptions are always relative. I do want to throw out a point about daycare costs and SAHM/SAHD's (in full realization that your analysis of Family B was in part tongue-in-cheek/devil's advocate to the reader question): Quality day care for 3 kids under 6/7 IS EXPENSIVE (kindergarten may only be 4 hrs and many daycares charge full day rate for over 5 hrs); many employment decisions are made w/ this in mind. In a 2-parent family with significantly unequal incomes, it could make the most economic sense for the lower-earner parent to stay home for a while. Also, an unemployed person may be receiving state benefits that would end if they were to take a low-wage service/retail/manual labor job. If the wages from the "get-by" job were less than unemployment benefits plus the cost of daycare, Dad B is doing the family a favor, at least in the short term. This was certainly a topic of discussion when my husband's company was laying off - luckily he found a new (better) job before it became a real life issue! Interesting reader question and thought-provoking, as always, post! I certainly echo the “judge not” message and the idea that one’s choices, circumstances, and perceptions are always relative. I do want to throw out a point about daycare costs and SAHM/SAHD’s (in full realization that your analysis of Family B was in part tongue-in-cheek/devil’s advocate to the reader question):
Quality day care for 3 kids under 6/7 IS EXPENSIVE (kindergarten may only be 4 hrs and many daycares charge full day rate for over 5 hrs); many employment decisions are made w/ this in mind. In a 2-parent family with significantly unequal incomes, it could make the most economic sense for the lower-earner parent to stay home for a while. Also, an unemployed person may be receiving state benefits that would end if they were to take a low-wage service/retail/manual labor job. If the wages from the “get-by” job were less than unemployment benefits plus the cost of daycare, Dad B is doing the family a favor, at least in the short term. This was certainly a topic of discussion when my husband’s company was laying off - luckily he found a new (better) job before it became a real life issue!

]]> By: Beth B. http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html#comment-27403 Beth B. Mon, 08 Sep 2008 12:50:45 +0000 http://fabulousfinancials.com/?p=1305#comment-27403 WRT the unemployment party... I actually think it is a good idea. I firmly believe if you are actively and aggressively seeking employment, it is essential to get the word out to as many people as possible. Networking has ultimately led to MANY job offers. By hosting an "unemployment party", it seems that the hosts are saying "Mr A is looking for work and we are leaving the door wide open for talking to each guest about job opportunities that they may know of". And frankly, if the hosts laid out a big expensive spread, rather than going potluck, the urgency of finding work may not come across to the guests. IMHO. B WRT the unemployment party… I actually think it is a good idea. I firmly believe if you are actively and aggressively seeking employment, it is essential to get the word out to as many people as possible. Networking has ultimately led to MANY job offers.

By hosting an “unemployment party”, it seems that the hosts are saying “Mr A is looking for work and we are leaving the door wide open for talking to each guest about job opportunities that they may know of”. And frankly, if the hosts laid out a big expensive spread, rather than going potluck, the urgency of finding work may not come across to the guests.

IMHO.

B

]]> By: Rufina http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html#comment-27375 Rufina Mon, 08 Sep 2008 02:38:27 +0000 http://fabulousfinancials.com/?p=1305#comment-27375 Thanks SM! I have heard of divorce parties, but unemployment party :-O ? That is weird to say the least especially if you asking your guests to bring potluck that just does not add up, like totally defies logic, like an oxymoron kind of situation. SM, my coctails are wearing off by now, you can tell right? Thanks SM!
I have heard of divorce parties, but unemployment party :-O ?
That is weird to say the least especially if you asking your guests to bring potluck
that just does not add up, like totally defies logic, like an oxymoron kind of situation.
SM, my coctails are wearing off by now, you can tell right?

]]> By: dogatemyfinances http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html#comment-27372 dogatemyfinances Mon, 08 Sep 2008 00:59:18 +0000 http://fabulousfinancials.com/?p=1305#comment-27372 Well put, Single Ma. I'd also like to point out the obvious fact that people are not always totally truthful about their salary and your dear reader's assumptions might just be dead wrong. It's really hard to guess how much someone makes--also based on your own experiences. <strong>This is so very true. Sometimes we assume people earn more based on their external appearance or their lifestyle. This assumption is based on personal experiences, especially in a comparison like this one. [-SM]</strong> Well put, Single Ma. I’d also like to point out the obvious fact that people are not always totally truthful about their salary and your dear reader’s assumptions might just be dead wrong. It’s really hard to guess how much someone makes–also based on your own experiences.

This is so very true. Sometimes we assume people earn more based on their external appearance or their lifestyle. This assumption is based on personal experiences, especially in a comparison like this one. [-SM]

]]> By: caryn http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html#comment-27361 caryn Sun, 07 Sep 2008 18:10:07 +0000 http://fabulousfinancials.com/?p=1305#comment-27361 EXCELLENT post. i couldn't agree more w/you Single Ma. IMO, while it can definitely be hard to resist the urge to make judgements, it's very important to fight that urge and focus on what you can do to be a good friend to the friends/family that you are tempted to judge and to focus on what you can do for yourself to make sure you don't find your own self in that situation that you judge to be "bad". to add to the "judge not lest ye be judged" how about "never judge a person until you've walked a mile in their shoes". that's another one i always try to keep in mind. EXCELLENT post. i couldn’t agree more w/you Single Ma. IMO, while it can definitely be hard to resist the urge to make judgements, it’s very important to fight that urge and focus on what you can do to be a good friend to the friends/family that you are tempted to judge and to focus on what you can do for yourself to make sure you don’t find your own self in that situation that you judge to be “bad”. to add to the “judge not lest ye be judged” how about “never judge a person until you’ve walked a mile in their shoes”. that’s another one i always try to keep in mind.

]]> By: SingleGuyMoney http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html#comment-27359 SingleGuyMoney Sun, 07 Sep 2008 17:25:49 +0000 http://fabulousfinancials.com/?p=1305#comment-27359 Well put as always SingleMa. I actually have a post going up this week about the same thing. My good friend from college is getting laid off and is much like Family "A". <strong>Look forward to reading your post this week. [-SM]</strong> Well put as always SingleMa. I actually have a post going up this week about the same thing. My good friend from college is getting laid off and is much like Family “A”.

Look forward to reading your post this week. [-SM]

]]> By: Rufina http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html#comment-27354 Rufina Sun, 07 Sep 2008 15:18:50 +0000 http://fabulousfinancials.com/?p=1305#comment-27354 Now if you guys can just explain to me what is this all about-what was the point of this lade's post, what was she trying to say that relates to this blog. I am not sure, maybe I had too many cocktails last night, explain it to me like I'm a two year old please? There are tons of family A, B, C, D, whole alphabet and then some if you add alphabets of all the other countries in the world, now what is so special about these two families that we need to sit down and think about them and their good or bad circumstances. I am lost here. <strong>You're a mess! You do know that, right? LOL The purpose of the email was to explain to me how two different families were dealing with similar circumstances. From what I understand, the reader's perception is that one family has abundance but claim they have nothing. The constant complaints were irritating to the reader because they appeared to be living on the high horse. Therefore, the reader wanted me to write a post about "perceived" scarcity - i.e. when you think you have nothing, but you actually have plenty compared to others. [-SM]</strong> Now if you guys can just explain to me what is this all about-what was the point of this lade’s post, what was she trying to say that relates to this blog. I am not sure, maybe I had too many cocktails last night, explain it to me like I’m a two year old please?
There are tons of family A, B, C, D, whole alphabet and then some if you add alphabets of all the other countries in the world, now what is so special about these two families that we need to sit down and think about them and their good or bad circumstances.
I am lost here.

You’re a mess! You do know that, right? LOL

The purpose of the email was to explain to me how two different families were dealing with similar circumstances. From what I understand, the reader’s perception is that one family has abundance but claim they have nothing. The constant complaints were irritating to the reader because they appeared to be living on the high horse. Therefore, the reader wanted me to write a post about “perceived” scarcity - i.e. when you think you have nothing, but you actually have plenty compared to others. [-SM]

]]> By: nofearingthemoney http://fabulousfinancials.com/2008/09/victims-of-the-economy-or-frivolous-spenders.html#comment-27353 nofearingthemoney Sun, 07 Sep 2008 14:43:17 +0000 http://fabulousfinancials.com/?p=1305#comment-27353 I appreciate the message: someone's perception of their circumstances, while perhaps not reality in absolute terms, is certainly reality in relative terms and should be respected accordingly. Excellent reminder. I appreciate the message: someone’s perception of their circumstances, while perhaps not reality in absolute terms, is certainly reality in relative terms and should be respected accordingly.

Excellent reminder.

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