Teenage Freedom and Responsibilities
During one of our many conversations this weekend, BabyGirl was excited to hear that I will honor the promises I’ve made over the last 3 years. Most important to her are 1) driver’s license, 2) dating, and 3) hanging out with friends on the weekend past dark.
I gave her a few minutes to glow in the aftermath of FINALLY being 16, then I had to burst her little bubble because freedom doesn’t go without rules. I kindly explained that 1) she will only drive my car during daytime hours, 2) all dates must be approved by introduced to mom, and 3) weekend outings will have a curfew that varies with the company and the destination.
And last but not least…
I also had to remind her that she is now responsible for earning an income to cover all non-necessities. I will take care of food, shelter, medical, personal toiletries, school related expenses, and other ‘important’ ish. I will no longer buy anything that isn’t a need - i.e. name brand clothes, shoes, jewelry, dining out, cell phone, etc. So you know what that means? Ya girl needs to get a j-o-b!
Although she’s 16 and doesn’t need a work permit anymore, due to school activities, working hours are still limited to weekends only (unless school is not in session). My previous rules will not change - GRADES. COME. FIRST. She agreed and was ready to hit the ground running. So I took her to the mall to get a few job applications. After one hour, we met back at the car and she had 5 job applications from her most preferred retailers. Interesting enough, they were ALL hiring. Isn’t she lucky? After dinner, she completed them all - 5 hard copies, 1 online - and I took her back to the mall yesterday to return them.
She already has an interview scheduled for Thursday. Thank gawd!
With her champagne taste and beer water money, I sure hope she finds a job soon.
~*~*~*~*~*~Work to achieve, not to acquire.
And always, BE FABULOUS!
This blog is the story of my life...a single mom who worked her way from nothing to financial freedom. Subscribe here and follow the rest of my journey.
13 comments:
Write a comment:
Want an image next to your comment? Get your Gravatar here!
Have you read the Fabulous Financials comment policy lately?
You’ve reared her well! I mentor teens and my current girl (a bona fide NYC flyy gyrl!) is about to cause me to pop an artery. She’s only 16 but has carried the responsibility of providing for all her necessities (college prep books, lunch money) and desires (including weekly nail tips, hair blown out, two-week trips to Italy and authentic D&G shades) for much a while. She is so caught up in stuff and providing for herself that it is hard to switch her focus toward her future, e.g. college.
Keep it up! I’m sure BabyGirl is learning so much from you!
XOXO Cocoa
She is going to be so ready for college!
Hats off to you Ma! Seems like you’ve done a fab job teaching financial responsibility. Question…..my lil’ suga mama is a pre-teen. She receives a weekly allowance but blows it before it reaches her hands. I thought about purchasing a RUSH prepaid card to force her to track her spending. What are your thoughts? Any advice would be helpful:) Thx
Sounds like a great plan. I still pay for my 18-year old’s cell phone, food, shelter, personal toiletries (sometimes), but he pays to maintain his car and any entertainment expenses that he has.
Parents should always honor the promises we make to our kids, or not make them. This says a lot about our integrity, and should encourage mutual respect between parents and children.
My daughter is only four so she’s far too young for a job, but I am already teaching her about financial responsibility (much to some people’s dismay.) She has a bank account where we make deposits of any gifts she receives over $5, and I also deposit into it from time to time. That account she will not be able to touch. The other is her piggy bank in her room, where she dumps loose change and small increments that she receives. She doesn’t have expensive taste yet, so when she does ask for something, we count how much she has in this bank, and if there’s enough, I explain how much she’ll have left if we do buy the item she wants. Surprisingly she chooses to continue to save for something else! As she gets older, I know I will have to adjust how we “manage” her money and the items that I will continue to pay for.
But the bottom line is it’s never too early to teach financial responsibility to your kids. And no doubt they will appreciate things more when they have to come out of pocket to buy them themselves. I like your approach with your daughter.
She takes after her Momma! - Faboulous !!!!!!!!
I bet she’s probably more excited than you. *chuckle* I’m sure she’ll get the job. Use of a car, a job, some cash you ain’t gonna be able to tell her nothing.
Best of luck to BG in the coming school year. I am sure that she is well motivated to abide by the deal. Ma don’t play!
You mean she won’t be on MTV’s My Sweet 16 show? I caught 5 minutes of one the other day and it was insane.
LOL @ the crossed out “approved by”. I like that the increase in freedom corresponded to increase in responsibility. My parents also said “no passengers” for the first six months, so less distractions.
Soon she’ll find out the wonder of FICA and income taxes as well!
Um yes, I know Single Ma is approving dates and not letting baby girl go out with any raggamuffin scrubs!
Seems like you have a great plan, it is amazing you are giving her enough responsibility and make her learn the hard work goes in to earning money. She is a one lucky teenager.
by the looks of it, BG is gonna do really good when she leaves the nest. you’re a great role model for single parents out there…heck, you’re a great role model for parents period!
You’re doing great! That sounds like a plan to keep her on track. It’s nice to hear about people making their kids work for things and have responsibility along with the privileges!