Fabulous Financials

…or is it?

This post is off topic and pretty lengthy, so feel free to read, comment, ignore, or delete. But I need to focus on something positive for a moment. Bear with me.

Also, this post was in draft for a while, so “today” actually means “Tuesday,” April 22nd.

The Old J.O.B.

Today was my last day in the office and the staff hosted a farewell brunch. According to the invite, it was originally schedule for 9:30-12:30, which I thought was a bit long to bid someone farewell. Besides, I don’t like people and I wasn’t in the mood to be the center of attention (you know I must be under the weather), so it was shortened to 10:00-12:00 at my request. Still a long time, but I didn’t want to press the issue too much. Ok, cool.

For some reason, I had a little extra pep in my step this morning – maybe because I was listening to Beyonce “Get Me Bodied” all the way to work. That’s my song! I need to give thanks to Bey for giving me extra motivation to focus on the busy day ahead.

First things first. Despite multiple interviews, my boss still has not found my replacement. So that means she will assume most of my management duties and the administrative work was divided amongst three people. Yes, you read that right. It will take FOUR people (including boss) to complete the tasks of ONE person. That should give you an idea of the load I carried. Hmph! But guess what? All of a sudden, almost everything that had been lagging over the past month or two miraculously began to progress. People were asking me to review reports, attend meetings to make quick decisions, send emails to confirm something I’d said, sign documents, approve vacation, etc. Lesson learned: quit your job and things get done. I think I was more productive today than I’ve been in the past 12 months. LOL

Mr. Eye Candy

Second thing. Mr. Eye Candy. If I were only infatuated with him before, I absolutely adore him now. A lot of things I’m currently dealing with in my personal life would appear to be “baggage” to the average person who is just getting to know me. But this man. *sigh* This man has been extremely supportive. He gives me space when I need it, he’s been my shoulder to cry on when I need him, he’s been my sounding board and voice of reason when I need it, he’s given me reality checks when I need them (as painful as they have been), and he’s been my #1 supporter during this career transition. I…I just don’t know what to think of him. It’s too good to be true. And my mama always told me if something seems too good to be true, it probably is. So I’m afraid to say he’s the total package just for me because 1) it seems so cliche’ and 2) I don’t want to jinx anything. I also don’t want to seem like I’m waiting for the ball to drop or uncover some monstrous flaw that will make me regret the day I met him. One of my girlfriends said he’s probably gay. Ha! Lawd, I’d just die! Although I do have two gay friends who have offered to put their gay-dars on the case. Not a bad idea. LOL

Anyhoo…with today being my last day, I have to honestly admit that he made it extra special. He called around 8:30 to see if I had made it to office. Being the typical slacker with short timer-itis, I was running late, but I told him I was on my way. When I finally arrived about 15-ish minutes later, he was already sitting in my office waiting for me. Very surprised to see him – he NEVER allows himself to be seen alone with me in the office unless we are specifically talking about work – I didn’t quite know what to expect. But I soon discovered that he came bearing gifts. Gifts he thought were inappropriate for open production during brunch. *smh* He’s so uber professional.

I noticed ALL of the gifts required some thought and creativity, which also proved to me that he actually “listens.” Men, take notes. Listening (and remembering) is sooo important to a woman. Trust me! This is how he earned major brownie points:

1- First, he gave me this Cross Sauvage Fountain Pen. The presentation was beautiful. It was neatly packaged in silver wrapping paper with a matching silver bow. Surely, a woman wrapped it. Inside was a brown velvet box, a personal hand written message, and the pen was hidden inside a brown velvet pouch. I was impressed. He said it was a gift from him and his business partner. They wanted me to have something special from their company, something valuable, and something that I would actually use in my next position “as I sign away my freedom when approving documents.” LOL Inside joke. You’d have to know what I do for a living to “get” it.

2 – The second gift was a bottle of Godiva Liqueur. Other than the fact that he knows I LOVE chocolate, I can’t tell you the history behind this one. LOL

3 – The last gift was a $100 gift card to Bath & Body Works. Last summer (June/July-ish), he complimented the scent that I was wearing and later confessed that it was his initial attraction to me. LOL As we began to spend time together outside of work, he asked for the name of it. I guess he thought it something special, but it was only cucumber melon from B&BW. With it being such a light scent, I wear it in layers (shower gel, lotion, and body spray) to make it last throughout the day. A few months ago (Jan/Feb-ish), he asked why I didn’t wear it anymore. So I explained that I wear B&BW products in the spring/summer because the scents are light, but I wear actual perfume in the fall/winter.

Keep in mind, this was months ago. But lawd, let me tell ya. This man does NOT forget an-y-thing! So he gives me the gift card and says, “it’s spring again and I want to smell cucumber melon everyday.” BAAA HAAA HAAA I thought to myself “Noooooooo problem!” LOL

After all of that, I was D-O-N-E. I almost forgot we were at work. Hell, I didn’t even realize my phone was ringing, BB was buzzing, and someone was knocking at the door. And if you asked me, I wouldn’t have been able to tell you why I was attending a farewell brunch in less than an hour. Thankfully, I snapped back to reality (sorta), we finished our conversation (for the time being), he gave me a hug (bad move), and I proceeded with my day (barely).

My Farewell Brunch

At brunch, it was nicely arranged with a decent turnout. Nothing compared to this, but all the important people were well represented. My boss gave a speech that made people say “awwwwwww” at least a dozen times. I could have choked on my OJ, but anyhoo. About five other people wanted to share a few things, but unfortunately, I don’t remember a dang thing they said. My body was there, but my mind was somewhere else – divided between Mr. Eye Candy and my personal problems. So I zoned in and out and only responded when I heard my name. Then, as if on cue, he walked in right when the last person was wrapping up. I prayed that he would not offer to say anything. I wanted to give my ‘thank you’ speech, work the room, politic for about an hour, and get the heck out of there.

*sigh* No luck.

He had to be a damn comedian, which prompted more people to chime in and share their $0.02. Then, my antics over the past year became the highlight of the party. Mr. Eye Candy joked about how I handle myself in a room full of men. He shared specific examples from the project we worked on together and said I transformed with masculine qualities right before his eyes. Then moments later, I became feminine again. Shyt wasn’t funny. LOL

My direct reports wanted to reminisce about the random occasions when I had to rip apart an unsuspecting soul for trying to pull a fast one. They also shared something I didn’t know about until today. They thought it was unusual that I had such a keen eye for detail, so the ring leader (no one would confess) came up with a bright idea to play a trick on me. For the past few months, someone would volunteer to give me a document with intentional errors just to see if I would catch them. Apparently, I always did, so the bets continued. Somebody won a free lunch at least once a month. Bastids. LOL

A few people shared their sentimental moments when I helped them deal with a difficult situation. Many commented on my fashion sense and the different shoes I’ve worn over the year. While others tried to imitate my mannerism and quoted several phrases that have become known as Single Ma-isms. LOL

Before I knew it, it was after 12:00. The brunch was inching closer to the 3 hours as originally planned. Oh well. The gifts were also VERY generous and unexpected. They sent ya girl home feeling some kinda special. But more important than gifts, I expanded my network and established new relationships over the past year. Listening to my colleagues helped me realize that I’d made a significant impact, although I didn’t feel valued by the most important person – my boss. It’s unfortunate that she had the power to force my hand, which led to my decision to leave. Her behavior over the past month reminded me almost daily that I made the best decision for ME. And what’s ironic – she signed my farewell card with “I’m sorry for the way things happened. I will always have a place for you if you ever want to come back.” *sigh* I guess that was her way of apologizing and clearing the air.

Whatev. It’s water under the bridge now.

Thanks to her boss, I’m attending another leadership class for the rest of this week. Then I will officially close this chapter of my career and begin another (to be explained later).

But that’s the easy part. My career and finances are always on lock.

There are still many unresolved issues in my personal life and they mean way more to me than anything I’ve mentioned above. A job, a man, or all the money in the world can’t make the pain go away. I guess I have to work that much harder and focus on what’s really important.

Give Single Ma a few more days (maybe a week) and I’ll be back in full effect.

Until then…thanks for the outpour of love and support in the comments, emails, and voice mails. Although I can’t respond to you right now, I do read and listen to them all. Keep ‘em coming. They strengthen me. I’m trying my best to keep the glass half full.

With Love,