Closure
I had a meeting with the boss’ boss today. Since I knew my reason for leaving was going to be the primary topic of discussion, I started jotting down notes last night to make sure I had an accurate account of the events that led to my decision. There were three major issues to cover and I wanted to make sure I didn’t forget any details. Before I knew it, I’d prepared a written report that was 5 pages long. Wow, I had a lot to say! LOL
Since he initiated the meeting, I allowed him to set the tone. He began with the “I’m sorry to see you go,” “everyone was surprised by the news,” “you’re highly regarded,” etc, etc, etc. Then he opened floor so that I could share my concerns. I began with the disclaimer that I enjoy the technical aspects of the job, I love what I do, I appreciate the opportunity, how much I’ve learned in such a short period of time, etc. Then I addressed each of the three issues from the least impact on my decision to the greatest.
Some areas, I spoke to from memory. While others, I read verbatim from my notes. I tried to keep the meeting very professional because it wasn’t intended to be a bitching session or an opportunity to gripe. I just wanted to keep all the details factual and objective. However, I did get emotional when I reflected on one event, but I immediately regained my composure and continued. On several occasions, he stated that he was impressed with my preparation and how thorough I was with the details of each event. I could tell by his body language that he was shocked by some of the things I shared, and surprisingly, he started taking notes. Where appropriate, he apologized profusely on the person’s behalf, and I expressed appreciation for the gesture. He admitted that he was aware of some of the issues, but he didn’t realize they were to the extent that I’d described. Interesting…
After sharing all of my concerns, he asked for feedback on how he could make the organization better. Based on experience at my previous employer, I provided a few recommendations regarding the morale, management and process improvements. Again, he listened intently and took notes. I don’t know why, but I was surprised. Then, he made his pitch…
He said, “After hearing everything you just said, I know what I’m about to offer better be good so I’ll give it my best shot and hope it works.” LOL He reiterated that they didn’t want me to leave, that I was a valuable employee, I had ideal executive characteristics, my career has lots of potential, he’d personally help me develop, etc, etc. Then he summarized my reasons for leaving, in the exact order that I’d presented from least to greatest impact, and made a counter offer for each one. The offer included money ($xx,xxx), an alternative work location for a shorter commute, and a transfer to another department.
I am amazed at what can be pulled out of a hat when you’re an asset to an organization, but I humbly rejected each offer because none of them can make up for what I’ve endured in the past year. I’ve seen enough and it’s time for me to move on. But he made one last attempt that I chose not to address. I didn’t want to insult him with another rejection on the spot, so I told him I’d consider it. He said there was no rush and I could consider it until my very last day.
Then he said, if I decided to go, I was welcome to come back at any time. Also, despite what I’d previously been told, he said I would still get my end of year performance bonus before I left, I could still take the next leadership course scheduled for the end of April, and they would still honor my 2 year relocation agreement to assist with the administrative costs of selling my old home and buying a new one. Since I was only obligated to give them one year and upheld my end of the bargain, he said they wouldn’t hold it against me. That made me smile, and for a teeny tiny second, I considered staying. Instead, I thanked him for his time and told him I’d be in touch.
By 10:45, I was in my car and headed back to the other office.
When I arrived, the only thing she had to say was “I’m afraid to ask, but do I still have a job?”
*sigh*
I reserved comment.
I just have to keep telling myself, this will be over in 3 weeks.
~*~*~*~*~*~Work to achieve, not to acquire.
And as always, BE FABULOUS!
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I completely understand where you’re coming from. Know only that what goes around comes around, and if you did your best and worked hard, you have no bad karma coming out of this. Anyone who may have wronged you or your position is the one who needs to watch out.
Chin up!
Why did she ask such a dumb azz question? LOL!
oh I know what he had offered you that you did not mention
your boss’s position, you should take it with the money and all the perks
I’m not surprised he took notes. I would have as well, especially if I intended to make a pitch. Sounds like he made a good attempt, so at least he didn’t insult you, but well, you know, “love and diamonds.”
[When I arrived, the only thing she had to say was “I’m afraid to ask, but do I still have a job?”
*sigh*]
sigh indeed…lol
Hi SM,
I found your site via linkage to one your Professional Woman, which are on my list to read this weekend, posts from My Money Blog. I did some browsing, and you are inspirational and quite a riot! I’ll be getting busy calculating my net worth and setting some goal this weekend. Good luck on your next three weeks; I’m sure you’ll post about them!
wowwwwww. i mean, is this really real?! lol…i don’t mean to make light of the situation, but i cannot believe the events that have taken place. how you’ve handled everything should be put in the “rule book.” i hope i never have to experience this, but if i do, i hope to be able to think back to how you’ve handled yourself and apply it.
can i ask how you’ve dealt with the stress of all this? i am a woman with a strong leadership style at work and i’ve recently discovered that some are not able to handle it. i’ve committed to change some things and i’m working on moving forward, but this whole thing has me seriously stressed. i’m struggling with how some perceive me and the person i know myself to be. some days i feel like i want to leave the company and other days i feel a real sense of support and i want to stay and further my career…my mind’s not completely made up one way or the other and i’m stressed the “f” out as a result.
thx.
So I hope you share more of the details on this. I can’t imagine what she has done to you that she could ask if she still had a job? That’s as much as a confession and clearly anything that was done was intentional. Amazing. So hopefully you will share the story one day. Enjoy the rest of your time there and the next phase of your life!
You are a total role model! Inspiration. That’s why you’re the first blog on my roll and I read your page first every day.
Did she really asked that question? LOL I am really lucky that something like this is absolutely unthinkable with my boss. Considering, that she is your boss, and should be more mature, more proffessional …… LOL
P:S Your blog is great, very helpful, very interisting. I got a lot of new ideas considering: spirituality,
this what you call “let it go”, how to manage to be a mom and still have a good career, better self esteem,….
I just wanted to say that your a constant inspiration and role model for any professional woman. I’ve learned a lot from you. Thank You!
ROTFLMAO hahahaaaaaaa so now can I go kick her in the shins?? she won’t know what hit her!!!!
*ok I’ll wait until you totally vacate the building*
Ooo I am feeling extra nosey. What in da world went on over there.
Chick knew she was doing wrong. She need to start looking for another job herself.
I have been through this myself over the last 18 months and like you, nothing they did would make me stay. I begin my new job May 1st and know it was the right decision.
Best wishes to you, us singles have to be strong and have a good understanding of our emotional and mental health needs as well as our financial ones!